Thursday, August 21, 2008

Wednesday, Thursday, Happy day...

I have completed the first 2 days of Nursing Orientation. It was long. It was scary. I feel SO intimidated... but I made it here- so I must have been doing something right.

I'm starting to think I might actually be able to do this thing. Maybe. The instructors seem amazing, and the rest of my class are even more than amazing. I get to go through all this with people that I know and know I can count on- and I am starting to lose the anxious, and gain the excited.

Sleep deprivation, and fast food meals- here I come!!

Monday, August 18, 2008

Now THATS a birthday

As previously mentioned, Birthdays and I don't get along too well. In fact the only good thing EVAH to come 'round my dreaded B-day is...

Yet another birthday.

THIS birthday is much better- much more worth celebrating. And this was a good one!

Little Miss Clara turned 2 today- and was spoiled rotten- as it should be. Gifts and cupcakes and balloons and new dresses- the little girly girl had a great day. And her good day, pretty much wipes my not so good one away.

Thanks Claire~ you always find a way make momma smile :)

breathe out...pause....deep breath

Looks like I am jumping back into the fray.

In the past week I have ... had to say good bye. I met new people, and got to visit with an old friend. I had great phone calls, and tearful emails. I dealt with what I had to, survived what I thought would be unbearable, and am still here to tell the tale. I was scared, anxious, lonesome, and sad. I was brave, and in the moment, supported and true.

I got to go out, had the chance to stay in. I laughed, and I cried. I (hopefully) showed my kids how to be stronger than you think you can be. I was supported and supporting, and showed them that I will always be there for them. No matter what, no matter when, no matter why.

Last week I Lived.

It was hard. It was bumpy, but I kept it together and kept my head above water. For the most part- and that's what counts. THIS week looks terrifying, and exciting all mixed together...that's how this week begins.


Take a deep breath.

I'm headed back in...

diving back in for more...

Oh- another fun filled and exciting Birthday survived. Man, I hate those things. If I could wipe this date out of existence- I don't think I could find the words to adequately describe the happiness that would bring me.

THAT date tend to draw "bad things" in like a toilet drain. Everything gets twisted around, and it goes down hill from there. And none of it is any good.

Honestly, THAT date literally makes me ill. There have been MANY cancelled parties, trips to the circus...and other activities... due to my many birthdays as well as my tendency to blow chunks before the festivities.

I know. You wish you were me.

To add to this wonderful pattern of disasters, sprinkle in (more than a couple) of forgotten ones. Mis-remembered ones... and a tip to all you hubbies out there- DON'T EVER argue with your wife on when her birthday is. She knows when it is. Honest.

I have had a few birthdays that came with life altering news... and that's always a nice added stressor. Come ON!! Getting old... (older) is traumatic enough- don't you agree? Knowing that it comes hand in hand with some always unexpected twist- that is completely and totally predictable in its uniqueness~ it about sucks the life out of you!

And I hate those surprises.

But somehow- I manage to survive. Survived another one- and hope next years will be better. What ELSE could happen? I really REALLY don't want to know~